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Thursday, January 7, 2010

Shilpa's Year to Live - Week One

You may recall my amazement when Shilpa, a pregnant young mother, joined a year to live. I promised I would get her to blog about her experience and here is her first installment.

A year to live -- Week 1

Well, it’s week one and I have started to think about my year to live. So many thoughts and emotions cross my mind. I am at a loss of what to say and how to begin.  In one year, I would be leaving behind a 2.5 year old son aka “Sharkboy”, a 6 month old baby aka “Little Kibu” and my hubby aka "Survivorman".

My immediate thought is "how Survivorman will handle the demands of the family. I worry that he will feel so alone and spread too thin.  Thank goodness, we have amazing group of family and friends who are there to support us.   My two sisters are god-sent. They are and will be the most remarkable role models and mothers to our children.  I have grown up in a family where, extended family members i.e. uncles and aunts take on the same role and responsibility as my parents.  Since my birth, my parents, uncles and aunts have given me support, useful advice, knowledge, and exposure to the world and new experiences. I see this trend continuing through our generation.  

I feel confident that my spirit and legacy will be passed on and shared with my children and grandchildren.  They will have a good sense of who I am and where they came from. I view the Bcelebrated social experiment as a way for me to materialize my thoughts, goals, stories etc so it can be shared with future generations. This is something we all talk about but rarely ever do.  I am constantly telling my parents and their siblings to write or record our family history and their life story. It is so rich and to have those stories forgotten would be a shame.   So, as part of my year to live, I am going to start capturing our family history because it is a part of who I am. I will do this on my Bcelebrated site, leaving private messages for my loved ones, and also in my journal.

The last time I wrote in a journal was in high school. I burned that one!  I don’t need my family to read those crazy feelings.  As an adolescent, I was filled with so much angst and unnecessary resentment.  I look back and wonder why I worried about such petty issues.  I guess it’s part of growing up!   Anyways, in 2010 I will begin to keep a journal.  A special thanks to Survivorman for getting me the perfect journal.

This journal will be filled with stories from my past, family stories that have been passed down, my hopes for my children, my bucket list and my thoughts as I go through the next 365 days.

The act of putting pen to paper encourages pause for thought, this in turn makes us think more deeply about life, which helps us regain our equilibrium.  ~Norbet Platt

I hope this runs true for me.

Finally, as I go through this journey, I hope to become more candid and open about my thoughts and feelings.  I want to share with you details and personal experiences.  But for now, I feel too naked.  It is going to take little time for me to shed my clothes! LOL!

Til next time.  Cheers! Shilpa

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